I come from a town that once was a fishing town and now it's the intersection of a golf course and a cannery. I don't go back there willingly and nor does anyone who is not a golf enthusiast with no sense of smell. That is what is now called progress and I don't want any. I don't drink beer or beetroot juice or eat yoghurt because my body is a temple and that shit'll kill you. You know who puts that in their faces? Assholes who play golf and have no function in their noses. My brother's kid bought me a drone for Christmas last year and I said thank you and then I took it outside and rammed it right into my neighbour's appalling racist Christmas yardlights and called the cops and told them he was making pipe bombs in his root cellar. I'm a terrible person.
Regarding books I've only written one book and it's called The Price You Pay. There'll be more, though, so you'll want to save up. That or move somewhere they don't sell books. Your call.
PEW Literary Agency Limited, 46 Lexington Street, London W1F 0LP | +44 020 7734 4464 | Copyright 2019 PEW Literary LTD. All Rights Reserved.